Faith-of Greater Worth than Gold

Often I sit out on our balcony, looking out over the city and wonder why we are here. It seems as if we leave the apartment , we are assaulted by so many emotions, it would be easier to just stay inside and bide our time until we are to go back to Malaysia. Hiding, staying in my comfort zone has always been something I loved to do. Just wanting to curl up some place safe, familiar and keep to myself. Even as these thoughts flow through my mind, the voice of God keeps reminding me that He brought us here for a purpose. That purpose isn't to site see and shop, it has to be something of more substance.

When we left America this time around, it was clear God wanted us to learn much in the days ahead. There is something inside of me that doesn't feel like I am "doing" anything unless I am physically doing something. So while I like to hide in my comfort zone, the other side of me is always stirring to get up and go. Again, this brings me back to why God wants us here at this moment.

We have been here a little over three weeks and after much struggling, it is starting to become more clear. Faith. With all the cautions about safety, especially concerning the children. All the darkness blending into the beauty of the area. There really is so much to learn. With every culture we are blessed to experience, there is always something to learn....not to embrace, but truly learn from. Being offered the opportunity to experience life in this manner opens our eyes and hearts to things we used to just read about.

A few years back, well before we left for India, I ran into a pastor from Africa. When talking with him, I could only tell him how my heart ached for the people of Africa. He asked me if I had been and this opened the door for me to share my fears of leaving my comfort zone. He gently encouraged me to go, explaining nothing really compares to experiencing life outside that comfort zone. First hand exposure to what others experience. I didn't fully comprehend what he was telling me at the time, but as time goes by it is aparant that living in this way has opened our eyes to how blessed and in some cases how desperate we really are.

Looking back I see how God was slowly preparing us to make bigger moves in Him. Before we even knew Him, He brought Arizona...seeds were planted there, but none took root. After venturing back home, he brought us to Texas. It was there our eyes were opened to His love, His power and the ultimate truth of Christ. He slowly enabled us to move from comfort to comfort, seeking less for ourselves and depending more on Him. The struggles have been and still are great, but even better is what He is doing through those struggles. The refining He is allowing us to experience is amazing. This of coarse, leads me to share one of my favorite scriptures...

"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy" 1 Peter 1:6-8

Back to Bangkok. He didn't call us to live in fear, but to live a life of faith. Not understanding all that is going on around us isn't going to cripple us. God has reminded me of the importance of prayer, in some seasons, this is the only action He may be calling us to do. Only, but not small. We need to be in constant communication with Him, but there are times where we are to draw much closer to Him for ourselves and for others. I believe this is a learning period.

We have been asked to look for housing here, to get a feel for the city and to strongly consider a more permanent move here. Keeping this in mind, now is a time to absorb our surroundings and pray. To take our time, explore, listen and learn. A time, even though it isn't what I planned in my mind, a time to be thankful because God had/has something better at hand.

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1